At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
