Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Randomize
