i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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