You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
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Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
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i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.