I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
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just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
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We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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