If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
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