So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
