Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Randomize
