I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
