Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize