I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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