pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
I'm sobbing to NWA
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Randomize
