But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
