But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
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