she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Randomize
