im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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