you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
