yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
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How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
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Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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