i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
