you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize