so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
