well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
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I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
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How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
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