I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
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