Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
