Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
