I just cut my nipple shaving
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Randomize
