This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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