I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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