So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
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My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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