it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
I just found a bag of teeth...
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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