why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
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This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
did i walk over a car last night?
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
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