I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Randomize
