yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
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