It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Randomize
