I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
