Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
I have fence marks all over my body
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
Randomize