I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize
