No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
