Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
