Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
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