I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
