i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
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And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
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