i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
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thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
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