Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
this hospital has no fireball
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize
