So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
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