I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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