Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Randomize
