She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
