You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
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