But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
